I <3 public radio.

I love public radio.

But do you ever hear all those organizations, foundations and people who support public radio?

Don’t know any of them?

Yeah, me too.

So give me 30 seconds and I’ll tell you who they REALLY are!  Take a listen!

Jason Kempin/Getty Images North America

Isn’t it appropriate?

The cast of the Jersey Shore opened up the NYSE Euronext on Tuesday.  *fist pump in air*

Matt talks about it and how it’s so fitting and appropriate for our favorite fist pumpin’ superstars to ring the bell.

If you missed the video of the open, click HERE to view it on YouTube from CNBC.

MATT HAZE CHANGES LONGTIME PREFERENCE IN BURRITO COMPANIES FROM CHIPOTLE TO QDOBA
Keep reading to learn how three pieces of chicken can teach you a lesson about YOUR business.

Matt Haze, the radio, television and internet personality known for sending useless tweets and posting pointless news stories on Facebook, made a monumental announcement today regarding a well-known eating preference of his.  After being a diehard Chipotle fan and supporter for years, Matt announced he has changed his preference for the best burrito around to competing company Qdoba.

God forbid you get extra chicken on accident!

“After seeing a Chipotle staffer remove extra chicken she accidentally put on my bowl this afternoon, I knew a switch had to me made,” said Mr. Haze, who has been known by the tens of people that read his content as a loyal fan of the burrito factory house.  Mr. Haze continued: “The fine staff at Qdoba has been making an effort in recent weeks to put EXTRA chicken on my order, not watching to make sure that the exact amount is on there.  This says so much about their love for their customers, and not their bottom line.”

After throwing a hissy fit in line over the fact that his burrito construction specialist actually removed three small pieces of chicken after putting it into his bowl, Mr. Haze also remembered the amount of choices at Qdoba were also a sign of their true commitment to customer service.  ”Having the option to add Queso to a burrito or bowl to make my fat stomach satisfied is also a major factor in my decision today.  Once you’ve had Queso on your burrito, it’s tough to walk away from such a satisfying and fatty option.”

one word: Queso. on a burrito. ok that's 4 words.

Mr. Haze hopes his decision to go public with this decision can help all companies, not just burrito making machines, to see the little things in the process of building customer loyalty can help make or break a relationship.  ”I’m not here to bash Chipotle like a nasty ex-girlfriend who believes you broke her heart because she called you 5 times in 24 hours after she couldn’t get a clue.  I’m here to hopefully educate not just these great food operators, but all businesses, that the little things we see and notice in the experience of working with you and your service can make or break a deal.  Sure, the ultimate goal and result matters and that’s what you’re hired for.  But the little hiccups along the way can make or break the potential for a happy customer, referrals and recommendations to others.”

Mr. Haze plans to frequent both restaurants, but knows where his loyalty now lays.  ”Three little pieces of chicken killed it for me.  Will YOUR client say the same about you and YOUR services about one or two little things?  Take a look and keep that in mind.  It may keep them from going online or, even worse, their friends and family and ruin the potential for referral business.  Or prevent them from making really stupid and pointless press releases about you on their blog.”

mmmmmm waaaatteeerrrrrr....

So I either a) have been watching way too much Glenn Beck lately and decided to stockpile for the apocalypse when government leaders invade their own people with more socialistic ideals… or b) It was 3 for $10 at the store.

mmmmmm.... toooooyyyyyyyy

BlackBerry is getting tricky in the smart phone wars.

According to the New York Daily News, BlackBerry is tricking men into using their devices thanks to the help of beautiful actresses in New York.

Yes, you read that right.  A woman will flirt with you JUST for you to use her BlackBerry.

But sorry RIM, you can’t fool me THAT easy!

Find out WHY in today’s 2 minute podcast on BlackBerry’s new, creative marketing campaign…

Give us your tired... your poor... AND your MONEY!!!

What a shock.  A government organization raises rates on the users because it can’t find a way to fix a budget shortage.

That’s EXACTLY what New Jersey Transit did today.  Rates are going up an average of 22% statewide starting May 1st.

And as a current customer, I’m f*&%$#@ livid about this!

I’m livid because there is a much BETTER way to fix this problem.  A way that is a long-term fix to the solution and not a quick hole for a yearly budget.

Listen to today’s 2 minute podcast to hear how we can fix New Jersey Transit that is a win-win for EVERYONE involved.  And makes life so much easier for all as well.

Concrete jungle where dreams are made of...

Ahhh yes… New York City… The center of the universe.  The financial capital of the world.  That concrete jungle where dreams are made of, there’s nothing you can’t do.

But yet when I say “I live in New York” to someone, most of the time their first reaction is “but it’s EXPENSIVE to live there!!”

Um… yes it is.  That’s a fact.  I’m well aware of this.

But while drinking 4 dollar PBRs last week at a bar in SoHo, I realized WHY this city is so expensive…

Give me two minutes of your time and listen to today’s podcast to find out the why…

This week… we talked about Oprah’s new talk show on cable, Tiger Woods and his Nike commercials, and continued our debate on iPhone v. BlackBerry.

Here’s the audio for your so-bored-you’re-stuck-with-this listening enjoyment.

Onward people… Onward!

Men like this are in danger

When President Obama signed the new healthcare bill into law, I don’t think he realized what it may do to American men.  If we go by new research from the University of Aberdeen in Scotland, American men are about to get more…feminine.

Listen to this new 2 minute podcast to find out WHY and what this does to the America we know and love.

Cleveland rocks!

Cleveland’s favorite son, Drew Carey, recently put together a great video series on his (and my) hometown.  The series, developed by The Reason Foundation, looks at Cleveland’s past, its current state, and discusses real ideas how to get the city on the right path to greatness again.  Very well done series.

Then I read THIS editorial in Cleveland Scene, written by Frank Lewis.

Very quickly I realized that everything wrong with Cleveland can be summed up in ONE WORD.

Listen to today’s 2 minute podcast to find out what that word is… and what Cleveland TRULY needs to do to get back on the path to prosperity.

This week… I talk about the battle of Healthcare not on Capitol Hill, but on Twitter and Facebook.  Also, America’s last true role models have been cancelled off of our TVs… Heidi and Spencer and the rest of the gang of The Hills.  Also, what is Jesse James thinking?!  That and more on this week’s bonus below.

A 1998 piece of ClipArt showing a woman tanning outside, which really has nothing to do with this podcast.

Welcome to the new daily podcast, TheDailyHaze!

The price of looking good is going up. According to this story from Bloomberg, a new federal 10% tax on tanning is part of the new healthcare reform package just signed by President Obama.  What does this mean for the good looking people of America?

Who does this hurt the most?

Listen to this 2 minute rundown… and find out what I think REALLY matters from this story.  You may be surprised by the answer.

Concrete jungle where dreams are made of...

New York: the best sushi, ping pong and mac & cheese in the world. Don’t you wish you were as cool as us, rest of the world?

(Thanks Rosie Siman for the inspiration)

1. PING PONG. I love sitting in Bryant Park when the weather starts to break and watch local ping pong fans doing their thing.  It’s intriguing to watch.  What other part of the country will you see that?!  Nowhere.  I need to practice and get into a few games.  What a better way to relax and enjoy the weather and people of New York…especially this time of year.

2. THE L.A. BEARD. I lived in Los Angeles in 2008.  While I was there, I got lazy.  Lazy about shaving everyday.  What formed has been nicknamed by my close friends as the “L.A. Beard.”  They didn’t nickname it because they liked it.  They nicknamed it because they hated it.  No one back in the Midwest or east coast really got into it.  But I liked it.  Slowly but surely lately, it’s been coming back.  Will I keep it?  The jury is still out.

3. PIE. I love pie.  Do you like pie?  Not to sound like one of the best lines from the Men in Black movies, but I LOVE PIE.  Pie fixes everything.  My friends recently debated with me that ice cream was the fix all to our problems, but I disagree.  When was the last time you had pie?  Probably the holidays.  You usually only have pie during big family gatherings.  Ice cream is a more normal, and obvious, item to have when you’re not feeling well about life.  So why not treat yourself to PIE???  It’s different… and it’s damn good.

That is all today.

Carry on.

Have you seen this mouse???

There’s currently a warrant out for Mickey Mouse.  Pissed off New Yorkers are going to tar and feather the mouse in the middle of Central Park for being a greedy bastard.

While you were asleep, Cablevision pulled WABC Channel 7 from its lineup of channels.  That’s right… the flagship of the ABC Television Network was pulled from the channel lineup for many customers in New York, New Jersey and Connecticut.

Disney, which is WABC’s parent company, wants Cablevision to fork over $40 million a year to carry WABC’s signal on its channel lineup, according to an article in Business Week.  This is on top of the already $200 million the cable operator pays for the cable channels that Disney operates and distributes.

Why is Disney doing this?

Simple.

The network television business model is dying.  It can’t survive in its current form.  Cable channels are thriving because it has two main forms of revenue: subscription costs paid for by cable operators and advertising.

Network television only gets money from advertising.

So what do the big boys think they can do?  Do EXACTLY what one business model is able to do to make up the loss for the others.  But it doesn’t work that way.

Network television is in a desperate attempt to find revenue.  As advertising dollars start to dwindle thanks to the expansion of the media and targeted ways to get your message out, the network’s generic message branding options are not as necessary or as cost effective to businesses as they once were.

Simply put: they’re desperate.  And they’re trying anything they can.

In this shifting media time, the networks and local affiliates also need to learn that it’s time for THEM to change and let their business model evolve to the next level.

Many of the “traditional media” outlets are scared of what us new media people are doing.  They see competition because we are giving content to people on their level, how they want it and WHEN they want it.

Instead of fighting it, big networks and local affiliates, it’s time to ADAPT and join the new world of media.

Your business model is dying.  Don’t try to put a band-aid on something that needs to radically change.

Just change it.

This guy wins that award.

Last night during a trip to Barnes and Noble, I went in to pick up Seth Godin‘s new book Linchpin.

While taking a friendly stroll through the Business section, THIS book caught my eye and made me stop for a moment to look.

I'm sorry, what?

Do I need to explain why?  Nope.

It’s unique.  Different.  And, quite honestly, made me wonder a bit.

I love books and ideas that do that to me.

So I walked out of Barnes and Noble with TWO books last night.

Mike Michalowicz, kudos to you.  You caught my attention.  This should be interesting.

I know your hearts are broken.  You think you lost the true love of your life and you’ll never find that feeling again.  He was successful… charming… good looking… and knew how to wine and dine you on national TV with ABC’s money.

But let me ask you a question…

Like you have to question this choice?!

Why would you want that heart breaking douchebag on the left when you can have that stunningly good looking man on the right?!?

SO…

Friday.  8:30.  Applebee’s.  I’ll be in the booth in the corner waiting for you with a rose.

Hope you don’t mind that we get the 2 for $20 special.

See you then.

Love,
Your Prince Charming

Captain Obvious: Saving dumbasses from personal injury since Adam ate the apple that Eve said no to ions ago.